The productivity/who is ever going to read this post

This is me starting that blog I was supposed to start a while ago so that people can find me when I finally do publish that book...whenever that will be. I’m not going to pretend that there are many people that really want to read my random thoughts. You know, other than my mom. 

But then, maybe I don’t really want my mom to read my blog, because I’ll probably just post something about how I wasn’t as productive today as I wanted to be, and she’ll call and ask why I wasn’t productive, and I won’t really have an answer for her. Sometimes it’s there and sometimes it isn’t, and sometimes you just have to stay online talking to people who make you laugh so hard you almost spit water all over the overpriced computer that you’ve come to depend on for your writing. I find that when you're 2000 miles away from most of your friends and family, and the ones that aren't that far are scattered throughout southern California (or England), you can't take laughter like that for granted.

Writing can help, of course, or I wouldn't be a writer. Sometimes it helps calm my mind, and sometimes I can’t calm my mind enough to write. Those are usually the times I seek out something more distracting, like the online game where most of my productivity goes to die. I actually have been in a pretty good state of mind lately for writing, but there are still essays to correct and reviews to be written and resumes to update so I can get that second job that will make it even harder to be productive.

They’re all excuses, of course. If a writer is dedicated enough, they’ll be punching away at their keyboard every chance they get. I still think of what the Todfather (the program director for my MFA) told me once, about how he wrote for infomercials and came home afterward and even though he didn’t feel like writing, he did anyway (he probably said more than that, all of it phrased better or at least sounding more intimidating, cause that’s what he does well). It’s enough to remind me that I should be writing when I’m not, that I should be able to be productive even when I really don’t feel like it. That’s what I’m trying to do, but life is still there, even if a lot of it is more virtual for me right now, and I’m still just trying to enjoy what I can of it. 

This is me trying to justify my lack of productivity, so you don’t need to remind of that.

Btw, can I count this post as being productive?